15 Ideas on Finding Time to Think

April 14, 2015 by Leave a Comment

15 Ideas on Finding Time to Think

It seems there is never enough time for anything these days. There are so many tasks we need to get done, so many things we need to do in order to maintain some sort of pace in order to avoid getting buried by life. But, this leaves little time for contemplation. There’s just no time to think. The kind of thinking where you can get rid of distractions and do away with that little voice in your head reminding you of everything that needs to get done.

When I was a kid, and I would include my years in college, I had time to think and talk about stuff with my friends; important stuff, meaningful stuff. We would discuss life’s big questions – what do we want to do when we grow up?, who is up there in space looking back down at us?, why can’t people get along?, what are the best albums ever made?, what makes great artists so good?, how can we make the world a better place, do you think she likes me?

Even with classes and homework there was plenty of free time. And back then I didn’t waste it on TV. I watched Monty Python and the Packers games with my friends, but not much else. There also wasn’t the distraction of social media.

There are ways to get back our time. Instead of sitting in front of the TV all night and making status updates I’ve come up with some alternatives. All of these ideas I did at some point years ago. I thought if it worked so successfully back then why not go back to basics.

Here are 15 ideas on finding time to think:

Playing catch: There’s something relaxing about throwing a baseball around. Once you get into a rhythm it can be a kind of meditation.
Fishing: There’s nothing better to slow things down. It’s just you, a friend or two, a fishing pole, and the water. Most times I never even caught fish, but the conversations were great.
Riding a bike: Good exercise and you get to see things from a different perspective. As a kid I biked everywhere. It’s the only way I got anywhere sometimes. The sound of the rubber on the road can be hypnotizing.
Going for a walk: More good exercise. I don’t walk as much as I used to. In college it was the only mode of transportation I had. It makes your senses perk up.
Shooting hoops: More good exercise that forces you to concentrate and think about your shot. It’s good for focus.
Exploring/hiking: Is there anything better than getting away from it all and communing with nature? Listening to the wind blow through the trees or birds singing is calming. Add the sound of water running over rocks or a waterfall and you’ve got yourself the perfect place to stop and take a meditation break.
Building models: I loved to build model tanks and airplanes. It takes focus and discipline. When you start, it sometimes feels like it’s an impossible task because there’s so many pieces and it’s going to take forever to complete it. You can’t rush through it and it’s a good way to slow things down.
Drawing: I always loved drawing, like most kids. I took drawing and painting in college and it opened my eyes to look at things in a different way. Take an art class – it’ll get you thinking with a different part of your brain.
Looking out the window: I don’t know if anything beats daydreaming. There’s so much going on outside that you can’t help but reflect on what’s going on inside. Clouds, trees, insects, animals, and people can trigger so many thoughts.
Staring at the stars: This gets you thinking about life’s big questions. You can’t help it. It puts life into perspective looking up at the universe and looking at light that’s just getting here that might be hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of years old. You realize you are a speck yet full of possibilities.
Gardening/yard work: Getting your hands dirty reconnects you to the earth. It’s as if a chisel cracks away the shell of modern society and you and mother nature are reunited.
Planting a tree: There’s something sacred about planting a tree. Maybe because it’s going to be there for years; possibly longer than we are. It’s majestic, mighty, and unwavering.
Listening to music: I love this one. I get lost in music a lot. It’s where I go to feel like I’m alive. Music stimulates the creative side of my brain.
Road trips: This is where you can really get to know someone and know yourself a little bit better. It’s a great way to strip away the layers and be honest. It might be because you need to travel light and it gets you back to the essentials – food, shelter, sleep, and companionship.
Reading: Pick something that makes you ponder life like poetry, philosophy, mythology, or some sacred text (whatever that means to you). It elevates your thoughts.

I think this list gives us a way to get unstuck and think our way into a more positive existence. If we believe things will never change, we’re trapped. We need time to think and re-group. School has semester breaks, in football you have halftime; take time for yourself to re-think your game plan.

When do you find time for yourself? How are you able to think clearly with distractions? What are your results, or what do you hope the results will be?

Filed Under: Inspiration, Life Lessons Tagged With: ,

How To Remain Calm When Your Toaster (Or Anything Else) Is On Fire

March 31, 2015 by 6 Comments

How To Remain Calm When Your Toaster (Or Anything Else) Is On Fire

My work colleague bumped into another person at work when she was leaving the office we share and screamed when they collided. When my colleague came back she mentioned how when things startle her it makes her feel better to make a loud noise. She then reminded me of the story I told her about the fire extinguisher.

A number of years ago my sister was selling her house and stayed with my wife and me for a while. One day my wife and I were watching TV when my sister stepped into the living room and casually asked, “Where do you keep your fire extinguisher? Your toaster is on fire.”
I said, “I think it’s under the sink.” I got up, with no urgency, and walked to the kitchen, opened the cabinet underneath the sink and found it. I took it out and started reading the instructions. When I figured out how it worked I pointed it at the toaster and the flames jumping from it that were almost to the cabinets above it. I pulled the nozzle and the fire retardant foam quickly put out the fire.
People I share this story with are amazed at how casually my sister and I reacted. We were both cool and calm under what most people would assume to be a frightening moment.
I have always reacted to such things in an unemotional way. It’s a part of my nature, as it is my sister’s, but how did we get this way?
Here are four lessons on how to remain calm when your toaster (or anything else) is on fire:
1) Get the facts – It’s difficult to make a decision or react to what the real issue is if it’s clouded in emotion or judgments. You can’t fix things without knowing what the facts are, without the added flowery interpretation.
When I worked at AT&T I’d often get customers calling in to complain about something with their service, like the phone isn’t working, or their bill is screwed up. I would ask for specifics about what the issue was. This leads to lesson number two.
2) Ask Questions – The more questions you ask the closer you can get to pinpointing the issue. Most people tend to give you what they want to tell you. What’s important to them and how they feel. But, how they feel doesn’t affect how you need to approach things. Going back to my AT&T days a customer saying they don’t have dial tone on the phone in 2nd floor office is different than my phone doesn’t work.
3) Remain Objective – People have a tendency to exaggerate things. They bring their biases and past history into situations and give you their version of things. You can listen to what they say, but you need to strip away everything but the key details in order to get to the truth.
You need to remain non-judgmental. Once you label something, you approach in an entirely different way.
4) Don’t Get Emotionally Attached – We want to empathize with others, but we can’t get upset with them or excited. We need to help them, by taking a step back. When you are emotional you don’t think clearly. When you are faced with a crisis or conflict you need to be able to think clearly.
Think about it as if you’re an outside observer. If you look at it as though you have nothing to gain or lose you won’t be attached to it.
Is there something you do to keep yourself calm when chaos or conflict rears its ugly head? Share your comments and let’s help each other remain calm the next time we face it.
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Here’s to the 20 Year Anniversary I Didn’t Celebrate

December 9, 2014 by Leave a Comment

Here's to the 20 Year Anniversary I Didn't CelebrateI went to visit some friends who work at AT&T at the very building where I started my career with the company, back when they were known as Ameritech. 10 days earlier some of my former colleagues celebrated their 20 year anniversary with the company.

I was a little jealous. I wasn’t able to participate and celebrate with them because my job was downsized eight years ago. I felt I should be celebrating with them. The 20 year anniversary made me think about what might have been.
It was great to see so many people that I hadn’t seen in a while, 15 years in some cases! As I walked around the office, which hadn’t changed at all since I started there 20 years ago, I realized that what I wanted was the status that being someplace for 20 years earns you. It shows commitment, dedication, and a certain level of respect. It was an ego feeder.
I had no reason to be jealous. Although life has taken me in different directions, I am much better off now than if I had still been there. In the eight years since I’ve parted ways with AT&T I’ve found a new career in marketing, even earning an MBA along the way. I wouldn’t be doing what I’m doing now. And I wouldn’t be as fulfilled. Life is much richer.
Instead of looking at what might have been, look at what is. Now is the only moment that matters. Yesterday is a story that can’t be re-written and the sooner we let go of what was, the sooner we get to appreciate everything that today holds. My visit was a good reminder of that.
Here’s to the 20 year anniversary I didn’t celebrate and here’s to today!
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7 Steps to Become a Learning Machine

December 2, 2014 by Leave a Comment
7 Steps to Become a Learning MachineIn my last post I wrote about finding the motivation to learn something new. Once you have the motivation, how do you do actually go about learning?
There are three different ways to go about it; some people learn by listening, some by watching, some by doing. This is how school is set up. A teacher stands in front of class and lectures about a subject, writes on the board, and then has you work on it. But, how do you go further than that? How do you go from memorizing something to becoming intimately familiar with it?
Here are 7 steps to become a learning machine:
1) Model someone successful – Who can you model yourself after? Find someone who has done it before, with the kind of success you admire. How did they start? How did they learn? What were their breakthroughs to improvement? If you can learn shortcuts that will help you avoid their mistakes it might save you some frustration.
When I was learning to write songs, I copied what my heroes did. I tried to write songs like them. Listening back now I can still hear the influences – The Beatles’ “She’s a Woman”, Fats Domino’s “Walking to New Orleans”, or Roy Orbison’s “Only the Lonely”. I was learning how to craft songs like they did, but eventually I developed my own style. This also leads us to number two.
2) Model everyone – When I was trying to be a better baseball player as a kid, I tried to model my swing after dozens of major league players. I knew how everyone on the Milwaukee Brewers batted, along with others from the Royals, Yankees, Angels, Red Sox, and anyone else whose swing I liked.
By trying to copy how others players stepped up to the plate, approached their at bat, and swung at pitches, I could find out what worked and what didn’t work for me. Eventually I settled on a cross between Paul Molitor and Dave Winfield. Not that I was trying to be them, but what they did worked for me.
Today, I golf instead of play baseball, but I use the same philosophy. I model my swing after Ernie Els (because we’re about the same body type) and Inbee Park (because she reminds me to be fluid and take my time). Two different swings, but I can take something from each to make it my own.
Try everything you can to find out what works for you.
3) Read – This goes without saying. Read all you can about a subject; everything from the masters to people who might not be famous but have found great hacks to become skillful.
Make sure you mark up the book, take notes, jot down reminders or ideas as you read. If what you read just blows you away, re-read it. There will be a lot you missed the first time around. The lessons that resonated with you the first time will get stuck deeper in your head and you may look at other points differently.
4) Learn the basics first – We often expect expert results when we haven’t even achieved beginner’s skills. You need to learn to crawl before you can walk. It’s the same principle.
If you look at anyone who goes through a slump or tries to re-energize what they’re doing they always go back to the fundamentals. You’ll hear this in sports a lot.
The basics are the foundation on which you can go off in different directions, maybe in places no one else has ever gone before. But, but before that happens you need to understand the fundamentals.
5)  Practice – It takes time to learn something. We’re not going to be good right away, yet we are devastated when we aren’t. Instant gratification cheats us out of proper development time. I think our ego gets in the way of this. We expect to be good and we want to show others we know what we’re doing. We want to do this before we’ve put our time in. That’s what “paying your dues” is all about.
When you first try to learn something you’ll probably suck at it. That’s okay. Everyone starts out the same way. Give yourself permission to try something without having to be perfect at it.
We look at professionals and think they burst onto the scene overnight or they have natural talent that they didn’t have to work on. It may even be portrayed that way in the media. That’s false advertising. Those people spent countless hours practicing their skills before they got any sort of notoriety.
Nobody sees the sacrifice that went into developing their craft. Nobody sees the musician practicing scales at all hours of the day and night, or the swimmer doing laps at 4:00 am, or the baseball player at the batting cage all winter long, but we do see the concert, the Olympic Medal, and the home run to win the game.
Without those private hours of practice those public moments of glory would never have happened. They couldn’t happen. So, don’t take practice lightly, it’s your building block to personal greatness.
6) Never think you’re done learning – No matter how good you are at something, you’re never an expert. This keeps your mind open to continuous learning. Once you think you’ve mastered something you are closed off to new ideas about it.
Think of yourself as an explorer. There’s always something new to discover. With all you know, there’s so much more you don’t know. You needn’t look any further than the library. There’s so much information that’s written that it’s physically impossible to read everything out there and know everything there is to know. You’ll never know it all, so keep your mind open.
7) Share your expertise – When you share what you know it keeps you on your toes. It reemphasizes what you know (or maybe don’t know – re-read point #6) but it also allows you to see it from the vantage point of the person who is just learning.
Teaching also takes us back to each of the other six points mentioned. It can re-introduce you to the fundamentals, it can bring back memories of the people you modeled, and you may find something new to read. Sharing what you know allows you to experience learning all over again.
What steps have you taken to become a learning machine? Are there any steps that you use that I didn’t mentioned? What are they and how do they work for you?
Here’s to becoming a learning machine!
Filed Under: Inspiration, Life Lessons Tagged With: , ,

Learning Something New

November 25, 2014 by Leave a Comment

Learning Something NewWhen I was 10 years old my sister and I went with my mom to visit one my mom’s childhood friends in Jackson, Mississippi. My mom’s friend had kids around our age and every afternoon we’d head to the local swimming pool. At first I didn’t want to go because I didn’t know how to swim. Being in the water was terrifying. I thought I might go under and drown.

It was the middle of August and let me tell you it was hot, really hot. It didn’t take long before I decided I had to get in the deeper water to cool off. My mom’s friend’s son showed me how to do it and it didn’t take long for me to catch on. By the end of the week I was looking forward to going to the pool. I learned to swim in one week!
This is in stark contrast to my swimming lessons from five years early. My mom bid on, and won, swimming lessons from the Channel 10 PBS auction. She thought it’d be good for me to learn how to swim. Only I wasn’t ready to learn. Every time I got in the pool I began screaming. Even though I had a board to help me stay afloat I resisted every chance I got. I was sitting in the bleachers by the end of every lesson. I only went to about three or four lessons before my mom stopped taking me, I think out of sheer embarrassment.
There are many reasons we resist learning something new; our own ignorance of the subject, prior history, other people’s opinions, a bad experience the first time we attempted it. Whatever the reason, we can overcome it.
If we want to learn something new we are fully capable of doing so. We just need to make up our minds and see the value in it. When I was five there was no value to me in learning how to swim. I didn’t care, and that was reflected in my attitude. When I was 10 there was a huge value to me – I didn’t want to fry in the sun!
What have you been putting off doing because you’d have to learn something new? Find value in learning it and then start. Find a mentor, attend classes, or watch tutorials on YouTube. Just start. It will be rewarding when you learn it, and you’ll be surprised how much more of the world is open to you.
Filed Under: Life Lessons, Motivation Tagged With: ,

Giving More Than What’s Expected

November 11, 2014 by Leave a Comment

Giving More Than What's ExpectedBack in the days when record albums were issued in vinyl, I used to base my decision to plop down money for the entire album on whether or not I liked the B-side of the single. My thinking was, if the B-side was good the album would be good. If the B-side was good but wasn’t on the album, the album had to be great because they had more material than they could fit on the album.

In both scenarios I was almost certain to go out and buy the album. If the B-side wasn’t that good or felt like a throw-away track I wouldn’t buy the album and figured that the band didn’t have enough good material to make a strong album.

Maybe my logic was a little harsh, but I wasn’t going to let them get any more of my money when they didn’t care about putting out a quality product. And for a 45 that meant two solid songs. Maybe some record labels or artists wanted to save their best material for the A-side of the singles when they didn’t realize that the B-side was an opportunity to give fans, and more importantly potential fans, a reason to love them.
When someone knocks your socks off you’ll brag to your friends about them. Today, people have thousands of friends in their social media contacts. When they share their experiences the ramifications can be huge.
Maybe I’m just jaded, but for me that bar is pretty low. It should be easy to impress, but sadly, that’s rarely the case. The companies that do though, reap the rewards. The ones that don’t won’t last. How to do it? Give more than what’s expected.
Gary Vaynerchuk talks about this a lot. He says the key to success is to care…a lot. Giving more than what’s expected is caring in it’s truest form. People don’t forget experiences, good and bad. Do your best to make it memorable by giving more than what’s expected and you can turn an okay experience into one that’s special.
Have you been impressed with a company that went above and beyond? What did they do that was different? How do you give your customers more?
Filed Under: Customer Service, Life Lessons, Marketing Tagged With: , , ,

It Pays to Be Nice

November 4, 2014 by Leave a Comment

It Pays to be NiceYears ago my wife and I were flying out of O’Hare in Chicago during the Christmas holidays. We asked the gate agent at the terminal if there was a meal on the flight. He checked our tickets and said there wasn’t. We thanked him and headed to the food court to grab a couple of sandwiches.

We bought our food and headed back to the terminal when we heard our names over the PA. When we approached our gate agent, he told us that he had moved us to first class, and that there was a meal in first class. He smiled as he said the last part. We expressed our gratitude while he changed our tickets.
It was a crowded flight and he could have done that for anyone. What probably set us apart from the others is that we didn’t complain when we found out we didn’t get a meal. It wasn’t his fault, but I’m sure he heard complaints about it from others.
The lesson here is that it pays to be nice. You should always be nice without the thought of getting something in return; because it’s the right thing to do. Often you’ll be rewarded for it. We were rewarded for treating the gate agent respectfully. After all, he had no control over whether or not there was a meal on our flight.
I’m sure he felt good giving us the surprise upgrade. When people are nice to us we want to be nice back. If a server at a restaurant makes you feel special you’ll leave a larger tip. If employees at a company treat you like a friend and not a transaction you’ll visit more often, spend more money, and tell others about your experience. We love being valued.
When we are treated how we think we should be treated we remember it. It can fuel us for days with positive energy and it inspires us to be kinder. Thankfully, as human beings, we have the power on how we treat others.
Companies often forget that customers are human beings; not an account or ID number. We have names. We have feelings, aspirations, and fears. It benefits everyone to remember this. When we treat someone like a decent human being amazing things can happen.
Filed Under: Inspiration, Life Lessons Tagged With: ,

It Pays to Ask

October 28, 2014 by Leave a Comment
It Pays to Ask

Malcolm Gladwell at INBOUND14.

Last year I won tickets to go to INBOUND in Boston. In the marketing world, it’s a big deal. The conference boasts an amazing lineup of incredible speakers, authors, and experts. Unfortunately, I couldn’t work out my schedule with my employer and wasn’t able to attend. As the conference approached, I looked at going this time around.

I sent a message to the person who I won the ticket from last year; the company’s Chief Marketing Officer. I briefly explained my situation and asked if there would be any way I could cash in on the ticket this year since it didn’t work out for me last year. The worst he could say was no, right?
He emailed back the next day. His message was “sure, no problem.” He gave me a code to use and an email for someone to contact if I ran into problems. I immediately signed up and made preparations to attend the conference. By asking, I saved $999. It pays to ask!

How often do we want something, but never get it? They say that’s one of the main reasons a sales person doesn’t sell something is because they never ask for the sale. A simple, can I wrap that up for you, should we fill out some paper work so it’s yours, or do you want to buy it, could be all that’s needed to close the sale.
People aren’t mind readers. What you think are obvious signs are not that for others. Implying you want something and asking for it are two very different things. Children have no problem asking, “can I have this?”
That special someone you want to invite to dinner? There’s no chance they’ll go if you never ask. Sure, they could say no. If they do, you’re in the same predicament as you are currently. If they say yes, who knows what could develop. If you make your intentions known the possibilities are endless.
As I expected, the conference was phenomenal. The speakers were brilliant and I met talented people from across the country. I even made some new friends. It was such a blast that I can’t wait to go next year, even though I’ll have to pay.
I certainly learned that it pays to ask. What are you going to ask?
Filed Under: Life Lessons Tagged With: , ,

“Stop Talking. I’m Painting.” A Lesson in Focus and Eliminating Distractions.

October 21, 2014 by Leave a Comment

Stop talking. I'm painting.Recently my sister decided to give my 3 1/2 year old niece some paints, brushes, and paper; figuring that she’s old enough to be able to have fun without making too much of a mess. My niece enjoys coloring books and drawing, so it seemed like a logical progression.

Turns out my niece loves painting. She literally lost herself in it. At one point my sister asked if she wanted a sandwich for lunch. My niece responded, “I’m painting.” My sister asks again, “What do you want for lunch?” Without even lifting her head my niece responded, “Stop talking. I’m painting.” There’s a great lesson here from my 3 1/2 year old niece about focus and eliminating distractions.
How often do we let distractions dictate what we do? Even though her mom was asking her what she wanted to eat, my niece wasn’t having any of it. She was going to keep painting until she was done. It didn’t matter that her mom was talking to her. No one was going to break her concentration.
We often let life distract us. We could be in the middle of something; lost in what we’re doing. Instead of staying in the flow, we get distracted because there’s a meeting scheduled, or the phone rings, or we get an email and we can’t beat the urge to check it. We let those things interrupt us.
Why do we do that? Maybe we think it’s selfish. Maybe we don’t want to be rude. If we ignore the distractions, what we’re saying is “hold on, I’ve got more important things happening right now.” Instead of looking at it as selfish, look at it as self-power. It’s empowering to proclaim, “this is what I’m doing, and I can’t be bothered.”
It’s like those lights that go on when broadcasters are “on the air.” No one would dare interrupt them at that moment. What you’re doing is just as important as anyone else. Take the time to finish your work. You’re “on the air” and your work is valuable.
There is nothing more important than what you’re doing at this very moment. If you give yourself completely to the moment you can get lost in it like my niece. There have been times when I’ve been so focused on something that I’ve lost all sense of time. I did’t feel hunger. I did’t get tired.
It’s an amazing feeling to be so into what you’re doing that nothing else matters. The next time you start something give your undivided attention to it. Sign out of email, and Facebook, turn off your cell phone, eliminate anything that could be a possible distraction. See if you can get lost in it. If you get lost in it often enough, who knows, maybe you’ve just found your calling.
I’m thankful for this important lesson. What do you think? Will this work for you? How do you eliminate distractions from your life so you can focus on the moment in front of you?
Filed Under: Life Lessons, Motivation Tagged With: , ,

A Reminder to Appreciate Life

October 7, 2014 by Leave a Comment
A Reminder to Appreciate Life

My mom and me.

In my last post I wrote about some of my experience at INBOUND 2014. This marketing conference in Boston was inspiring and rewarding in more ways than one. First, it was great to see and hear so many wonderful people sharing their insights. I also connected with others who feel the same way I do about our role in making the world a better place and the amazing work yet ahead. It also confirmed that I’m on the right path.

I was on an extreme high after that experience. I felt energized creatively, spiritually, and emotionally. I was happy to share the experience with my friends and family once I returned home.
A few days after my return my mom got sick. Real sick. She had a severe case of pneumonia. Then the phone call from my sister, “you might want to think about coming up here.” Her tone said it all. I left with my wife within the hour to head to Tomah. It was a long two and a half hour drive to say the least. I wasn’t ready to say good-bye to mom yet, but that was a possible scenario once I arrived.
We surprised mom at the hospital. She seemed to be okay. The next day she was doing worse and was transferred to the Mayo Clinic in La Crosse. By the time she arrived she wasn’t breathing on her own and needed 100% oxygen. She was also heavily sedated. It was gut-wrenching to see my mom incapacitated with all the tubes, IVs, and machines hooked up to her.
It reminded me that life is fragile and to appreciate life; every second of every day. Thankfully mom is is on the road to recovery after spending six days in the ICU.
I was with my sister’s family and was able to spend time with my three and a half year old niece and three month old nephew. I thought about everything they’ll get to experience growing up and how I hope they appreciate life as it happens.
The time I spent up there wasn’t taken for granted. It was a reminder to appreciate life and soak up each and every experience. You never know what could happen next.

 

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