9 Tips on How to Be One of the Best in the World

August 6, 2015 by 1 Comment
9 Tips on How to Be One of the Best in the World

Jean Reynolds tees off at the PHC Classic, July 31, 2015 in Milwaukee, WI.

This past weekend I spent two days at Brown Deer Golf Course watching 144 professional golfers on the Symetra Tour battle it out in the PHC Classic. The Symetra Tour is the step before advancing to the LPGA and the top 10 finishers on the Symtra Tour at the end of the year will earn their way onto the LPGA Tour.

These players are among the top 400 women golfers in the world. I was surprised at the low attendance. Although it was the inaugural tournament, I expected more people. After all, these are some of the best golfers in the world. Who doesn’t want to watch the best?
The crowd demographic leaned towards the older spectator. There should have been more young people there. Every high school and college golf coach in Southeastern Wisconsin should have had their teams out there to watch how professionals play the game. They missed a special treat.
Watching how these women approach golf was an education. There were lessons that I can apply on the golf course, but they can also be applied in every day life.
Here are 9 tips on how to be one of the best in the world:
1) Devote time to practice. The driving range and practice green were packed. Each golfer started their practice session about two hours before their round. Then they went out and played for five hours in the hot, humid conditions. Instead of going in and calling it a day, many of them went back to practice some more; fine tuning their swing or working on their putting.
How often do we fine tune our skills? Do we take the time to get better? Do we go back over that thing that wasn’t quite right just to see if we can improve?
2) Learn from your mistakes and your successes. Players on the course take notes while they play. In their notebook, they’ll jot down what club they hit, where the ball went, what the conditions were so when they play that same hole again they’ll have an idea of how to approach things. They’ll know what’s worked for them or what hasn’t. They play from a position of strength and leave guesswork or chance out of the equation.
Keep notes of short cuts or tips that you can use later. When I was a team leader at AT&T I would keep a copy of every unique situation I ran into and what action I took to fix the problem. After time, I had built up a mini-encyclopedia. My peers and managers would send complex or weird situations my way because they knew I knew how to fix them.
3) Practice consistency. Every time the golfers step up to the ball, whether that’s on the tee box, in the fairway, or on the green, each golfer goes through their own unique routine. When they hit the ball they weren’t far off their target. And there wasn’t one miss-hit. Watching them was like observing the mechanism inside a pocket watch.
That level of consistency is hard to find. When you’re in that rhythm or groove it’s an amazing feeling. The goal is to get to that state as often as we can. Consistency can lead to good results.
4) Act like a professional. Golf is a game of tradition. These golfers respect the game, the players, the course, the volunteers, and the spectators. They play the game how it should be played. The golfers have confidence in their abilities but they didn’t show an ego.
Etiquette is another important component. There was no goofing around, foul language, temper tantrums, or loud talking. The don’t show up their opponent. They extend courtesy to the other players.
Do we act like professionals or amateurs? Do we understand the rules, the history, and the inner workings of the industry we work in? Does our ego get the best of us?
5) Know when to ask for help. Each golfer can only rely on their abilities on the course. It’s ultimately up to the golfer what shot to hit and to execute on it. At the end of the day it’s their name on the leaderboard.
Behind every golfer is a team, some on the course and some behind the scenes. 90% of the women had a caddie with them. They’d ask the caddie the distance to the hole, what club to hit, and how to read the green; getting the perspective from another set of eyes.
A friend caddied during the tournament. Because the golfer he caddied for was nursing an injury she did not play any practice rounds, so the first time she played the course was during the opening round of the tournament. My friend knew the course and he helped her when needed. She could take the information to make a better decision on what to do next.
If a caddie or coach is good enough for a professional it should just as good for us. Good advice from a trusted friend can be invaluable.
6) Play your game. 144 women competed in the tournament. Every one of them had a different swing and a different approach to the game, although there were many similarities. Some of the women could just crush the ball, others couldn’t. It didn’t matter. They played to their strengths.
We often see others accomplish something and we try to copy what they do. Copying can be good in some regards, it can give us a blue print to success but we won’t be our best until we start to consistently do things in our own unique way. We need to ignore the competition and be true to ourselves.
7) Take calculated risks. Most times playing conservative golf is the way to go, but if you play aggressively at the right time it can pay off. The question is when is the right time to take a chance?
The golfers played their game and waited until a situation presented itself where it would be okay to be aggressive. When the downside wasn’t that bad and the upside was good, the golfers took chances. They were strategic in their decision making. They may be presented with an opportunity like that a few times a round. They waited for those moments.
You won’t always guess right when taking chances, but taking them when you know your success rate is higher than normal is a good time to attempt it. Don’t force it. Wait for the opportunity to come to you.
8) Focus on what’s in front of you. Golf is the ultimate game of living in the moment. You need to have laser-like focus on the shot at hand and only that shot. You can’t jump ahead and you can’t think about the past.
The golfers took their time and studied each shot for a long time before addressing the ball. Sometimes they’d step back and reconsider the shot again.
I’m like many of you. I’ve got so many thoughts running through my head and so many things competing for my time that I am easily distracted. When I’m focused I can churn out work without even feeling time pass. I need to get to that state more often.
9) Play with the big picture in mind. The PHC Classic was a three day event. Sometimes tournaments are four days. Golfers know that one bad shot isn’t going to ruin their round. They deal with what’s in front of them and move on to the next shot.
We think one mis-step is going to doom our project or ruin our career. A golfer doesn’t think like that. For the entire three days of the tournament there were sustained winds of 20-30 miles per hour. It was windy but the golfers didn’t give up. They got on with the task at hand and dealt with the situation. We need to utilize the same mentality. We need long-term thinking.
The 9 tips on how to be one of the best in the world can help you on the course, in the office, or at home. Next time you’ve got some of the best in the world in your town, go check them out. You’ll never know what you’ll  learn. What tips have you picked up watching the best do their thing?
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15 Ideas on Finding Time to Think

April 14, 2015 by Leave a Comment

15 Ideas on Finding Time to Think

It seems there is never enough time for anything these days. There are so many tasks we need to get done, so many things we need to do in order to maintain some sort of pace in order to avoid getting buried by life. But, this leaves little time for contemplation. There’s just no time to think. The kind of thinking where you can get rid of distractions and do away with that little voice in your head reminding you of everything that needs to get done.

When I was a kid, and I would include my years in college, I had time to think and talk about stuff with my friends; important stuff, meaningful stuff. We would discuss life’s big questions – what do we want to do when we grow up?, who is up there in space looking back down at us?, why can’t people get along?, what are the best albums ever made?, what makes great artists so good?, how can we make the world a better place, do you think she likes me?

Even with classes and homework there was plenty of free time. And back then I didn’t waste it on TV. I watched Monty Python and the Packers games with my friends, but not much else. There also wasn’t the distraction of social media.

There are ways to get back our time. Instead of sitting in front of the TV all night and making status updates I’ve come up with some alternatives. All of these ideas I did at some point years ago. I thought if it worked so successfully back then why not go back to basics.

Here are 15 ideas on finding time to think:

Playing catch: There’s something relaxing about throwing a baseball around. Once you get into a rhythm it can be a kind of meditation.
Fishing: There’s nothing better to slow things down. It’s just you, a friend or two, a fishing pole, and the water. Most times I never even caught fish, but the conversations were great.
Riding a bike: Good exercise and you get to see things from a different perspective. As a kid I biked everywhere. It’s the only way I got anywhere sometimes. The sound of the rubber on the road can be hypnotizing.
Going for a walk: More good exercise. I don’t walk as much as I used to. In college it was the only mode of transportation I had. It makes your senses perk up.
Shooting hoops: More good exercise that forces you to concentrate and think about your shot. It’s good for focus.
Exploring/hiking: Is there anything better than getting away from it all and communing with nature? Listening to the wind blow through the trees or birds singing is calming. Add the sound of water running over rocks or a waterfall and you’ve got yourself the perfect place to stop and take a meditation break.
Building models: I loved to build model tanks and airplanes. It takes focus and discipline. When you start, it sometimes feels like it’s an impossible task because there’s so many pieces and it’s going to take forever to complete it. You can’t rush through it and it’s a good way to slow things down.
Drawing: I always loved drawing, like most kids. I took drawing and painting in college and it opened my eyes to look at things in a different way. Take an art class – it’ll get you thinking with a different part of your brain.
Looking out the window: I don’t know if anything beats daydreaming. There’s so much going on outside that you can’t help but reflect on what’s going on inside. Clouds, trees, insects, animals, and people can trigger so many thoughts.
Staring at the stars: This gets you thinking about life’s big questions. You can’t help it. It puts life into perspective looking up at the universe and looking at light that’s just getting here that might be hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of years old. You realize you are a speck yet full of possibilities.
Gardening/yard work: Getting your hands dirty reconnects you to the earth. It’s as if a chisel cracks away the shell of modern society and you and mother nature are reunited.
Planting a tree: There’s something sacred about planting a tree. Maybe because it’s going to be there for years; possibly longer than we are. It’s majestic, mighty, and unwavering.
Listening to music: I love this one. I get lost in music a lot. It’s where I go to feel like I’m alive. Music stimulates the creative side of my brain.
Road trips: This is where you can really get to know someone and know yourself a little bit better. It’s a great way to strip away the layers and be honest. It might be because you need to travel light and it gets you back to the essentials – food, shelter, sleep, and companionship.
Reading: Pick something that makes you ponder life like poetry, philosophy, mythology, or some sacred text (whatever that means to you). It elevates your thoughts.

I think this list gives us a way to get unstuck and think our way into a more positive existence. If we believe things will never change, we’re trapped. We need time to think and re-group. School has semester breaks, in football you have halftime; take time for yourself to re-think your game plan.

When do you find time for yourself? How are you able to think clearly with distractions? What are your results, or what do you hope the results will be?

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“Stop Talking. I’m Painting.” A Lesson in Focus and Eliminating Distractions.

October 21, 2014 by Leave a Comment

Stop talking. I'm painting.Recently my sister decided to give my 3 1/2 year old niece some paints, brushes, and paper; figuring that she’s old enough to be able to have fun without making too much of a mess. My niece enjoys coloring books and drawing, so it seemed like a logical progression.

Turns out my niece loves painting. She literally lost herself in it. At one point my sister asked if she wanted a sandwich for lunch. My niece responded, “I’m painting.” My sister asks again, “What do you want for lunch?” Without even lifting her head my niece responded, “Stop talking. I’m painting.” There’s a great lesson here from my 3 1/2 year old niece about focus and eliminating distractions.
How often do we let distractions dictate what we do? Even though her mom was asking her what she wanted to eat, my niece wasn’t having any of it. She was going to keep painting until she was done. It didn’t matter that her mom was talking to her. No one was going to break her concentration.
We often let life distract us. We could be in the middle of something; lost in what we’re doing. Instead of staying in the flow, we get distracted because there’s a meeting scheduled, or the phone rings, or we get an email and we can’t beat the urge to check it. We let those things interrupt us.
Why do we do that? Maybe we think it’s selfish. Maybe we don’t want to be rude. If we ignore the distractions, what we’re saying is “hold on, I’ve got more important things happening right now.” Instead of looking at it as selfish, look at it as self-power. It’s empowering to proclaim, “this is what I’m doing, and I can’t be bothered.”
It’s like those lights that go on when broadcasters are “on the air.” No one would dare interrupt them at that moment. What you’re doing is just as important as anyone else. Take the time to finish your work. You’re “on the air” and your work is valuable.
There is nothing more important than what you’re doing at this very moment. If you give yourself completely to the moment you can get lost in it like my niece. There have been times when I’ve been so focused on something that I’ve lost all sense of time. I did’t feel hunger. I did’t get tired.
It’s an amazing feeling to be so into what you’re doing that nothing else matters. The next time you start something give your undivided attention to it. Sign out of email, and Facebook, turn off your cell phone, eliminate anything that could be a possible distraction. See if you can get lost in it. If you get lost in it often enough, who knows, maybe you’ve just found your calling.
I’m thankful for this important lesson. What do you think? Will this work for you? How do you eliminate distractions from your life so you can focus on the moment in front of you?
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The Difference Between Pros and Amateurs

September 9, 2014 by Leave a Comment

The Difference Between Pros & AmateursI play golf maybe once a week. My goal is to break 90, but I’m struggling to accomplish that. At times I’m getting closer, others it’s far off. I also have to take into account that the golf season in Wisconsin is six months long. By the time spring rolls around, I’m rusty and it takes months to get my swing back.

I was watching one of the PGA events on TV recently and the pro golfers were out practicing every element of their game before playing their round. They spend hours practicing before competing in a tournament, not to mention the practice rounds earlier in the week to get a feel for the course.

I go out once a week (without having practiced) expecting to play a flawless game. That’s an unrealistic expectation. In order to go out and perform at a high level I should practice the skills to get me to a place where that is possible. Sure, the stars may align and everything could go my way, but odds are not in my favor.
If we want to become good at something we need to practice. That’s the difference between pros and amateurs. Pros practice to keep up their mastery. Amateurs work to get to a certain level of comfort and once that is achieved practice is forgotten.
There are things I’m good at. I’ve spent my time to develop those skills. We all have talents that we’ve honed with practice. Lots of it. Malcolm Gladwell has stated that it takes 10,000 hours of practice to master something. We can’t expect to be great at something without putting in that sort of time commitment.
What about those people who look like things come effortlessly to them? The truth is it’s not natural talent. It took determination and hard work. Respect the time and effort they devoted to their talent. We didn’t see them struggle, sweat, and work when no one was watching. We see the results. Looking at the box score is looking at the result, Earning a degree is a result.
High achievers sacrificed a lot. They could have used those 10,000 hours to party with friends or watch TV, but they didn’t.
Think of the things you’re good at. How much time did you devote to gain that level of expertise? More than you think. If you don’t spend the time to get better, you can’t expect to go pro.
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Staying Focused

May 6, 2014 by 2 Comments

Staying FocusedThis past weekend I went on a golf outing with some friends. Golf is a challenging game. There are the physical components to it; you have to be lined up to the ball properly, take the proper swing, etc, but the main part of the game is mental.

Golf forces you to concentrate on the moment; the shot at hand. When I think about hitting a good shot and focus on that I can often do it. But, when I think about the previous shot or the next shot, it affects my score – negatively.

The thing about golf is, you can’t look ahead and you can’t dwell on what happened earlier. The moment before you is the only moment that exists and it’s the only moment that dictates what happens next.
Focus is also critical to have a rewarding life. If we get too hung up on the past or we think about the future too much we drift through the present, then we wonder how we ended up where we did.
In golf, the scorecard is there to remind you how well you played. For me it shows how well you focused. It shows you what you did right and what needs improvement.
I think it would be helpful to have a daily living scorecard. Each day we could see where are successes and missteps are. It could remind us to stay focused, to not get distracted. It could help us to live the moment in front of us as the most important moment there is; because in the end, it’s all we have.
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When I Win the Lottery

March 25, 2014 by 1 Comment
When I Win the LotteryI’ve been thinking lately about what I would do when I win the lottery. It started when I sent back my Publisher’s Clearing House Sweepstakes entry. I could win $7,000 a week for life. That’s $364,000 a year! That’s way more than I make now. That’d be sweet.
I thought about what would I do if I won that kind of money. After thinking about it, I decided I’d like to write more, publish my work, record an album of my music, travel, exercise more, help more people, spend time with more of my friends. When it came down to it, the things I wanted to do once I hit the jackpot didn’t require more money; they required more action.

Sure, I wouldn’t mind having more money. I could find ways to spend it, but I don’t need that in order to live a fulfilling life. I just have to commit to living life on my terms. No one is stopping me from doing it. The only thing that’s holding me back is me.
So, here’s the question I need to ask myself, “What could I do today that would fulfill at least one of those items from my list?” If I can do that, then I’m living on my terms. Then tomorrow I ask myself the same question. Soon, momentum will build to where I’ll just be doing what I want that creates the life of my dreams.
I don’t need to wait for something to happen before I can live my life. I need to throw away the excuse, “I’ll start (blank) when (blank). You know the kind, I’ll start exercising when it’s warmer out. I’ll call my friend that I haven’t talked to in a while when it’s the right time. Don’t wait. Start today; stretch and do some sit-ups inside, call your friend just because.
Life is too short to put things off. If you feel like doing something, go do it. It’s like winning the lottery. And when Publisher’s Clearing House knocks on my door to announce my grand prize winning, I’ll have to ask them to hurry up, because I”ll be too busy living life.
What about you? What have you been putting off? What are you going to commit to today?
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Gaining Confidence and Success Through Visualization

March 18, 2014 by Leave a Comment
Gaining Confidence and Success Through VisualizationWe are more confident when we are in comfortable situations. When we’re surrounded by people and places we know, it gives us a sense of security. We feel relaxed, loose. We perform better under these conditions.
The unknown, although I wouldn’t call it terrifying, scares me. It makes my heart rate go up. My mind races about the endless possibilities. Anything could happen. Even though a lot of good things could happen, I tend to think of the negative consequences. Its unnecessary worry.
But, what if you put yourself into a situation where you could be more comfortable, even if you haven’t been in that real-life situation before?
I’ve found that visualization is a tremendous tool. It’s helped me feel more confident in situations that would have caused me great anxiety without it.
I started using this technique about 30 years ago. I was a baseball fanatic and had dreams of being a major league player. Back then we didn’t have the facilities that we have today, so I used to practice in my bedroom during the winter months.
I would pretend I was in the batters box, facing the pitcher. Most of the time I had a bat in my hand, but sometimes I didn’t. I would visualize my entire trip to the plate. Not everything was a strike and I would visualize how different pitches would come in, and visualize how a pitcher would try to work me, set me up. Would he throw a curve here, a fastball, a change-up? I would have to adjust my swing to where the pitch came in and the pitch that was thrown.
It was good practice for those months when I couldn’t go outside and hit a live baseball. When spring would come around and a new season would begin, I was confident that I could hit anything that was thrown my way in actual games. I had prepared myself through my mental preparation with the visualization techniques.
I’ve used this visualization technique throughout my life. When I’ve had to give presentations, prepare for interviews, when I know I’m going to meet people. I play the scenario in my head before I am in the situation. It helps me to be more confident.
I also use it in another sport now, golf. I go over the holes in my head before I play them. What will each shot look when I play it? Then when I’m on the course, I’m confident that I can replicate the same result. Jack Nicklaus and Tiger Woods are just a few of the greats that have used visualization to fuel their success.
Visualization has helped me. Let me know about your experiences with visualization. I’d love to know.  
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Who Matters to You?

March 11, 2014 by Leave a Comment

Who Matters to You?I spent some time this past weekend cleaning up my Twitter account. Apparently there’s some magic formula where you can’t follow a certain amount of people more than people who follow you. So I went through the list, and decided to un-follow anyone who wasn’t providing value to me. It gave me space to follow new people; people who matter to me.

It was interesting to go through the list; some people I have a personal connection with, so those are most valuable. Then there are those that share awesome information. I enjoy reading what they post and I learn a lot from them. They were keepers.

Some people don’t tweet much. Some people just tweet garbage. I don’t need to fill my life with junk. It was easy to un-follow them.
Then there are those that I follow, but didn’t follow me back. I liken this to the person who wants to tell you everything about their life, but doesn’t want to hear anything about yours. We’ve all known these types of people. If you give your time and energy to someone and they don’t reciprocate, it’s acceptable to cut the cord. In most cases its probably necessary. You don’t need to give your time and attention to people who aren’t going to give theirs in return.
Though I was cleaning up my Twitter account, it made me think of the people I have in my life. I want the people who matter the most to have the most involvement in my life. Those that take up my energy without providing any sort of nourishment or enlightenment in return I don’t need around.
It also made me think about whether I’m adding value to others. Do I provide enough support and encouragement? I try to, but it’s something I can do better with. I will make a conscious decision to give more of myself to those who need it.
Every relationship is a two way street. If you want to grow, be happier, be inspired, be with people who make you feel those things. Don’t devote time to people who bring you down or suck the energy out of you. Be with people that matter. Be with people who allow you to be the best version of yourself. Find out who matters to you and be with them.
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4 Lessons from the Oscars on Achieving Life-Long Dreams

March 4, 2014 by Leave a Comment

4 Lessons from the Oscars on Achieving Life-Long DreamsWatching the Academy Awards I was struck by the speeches of the winners. I could sense the struggles everyone went through; the rejection, the under-appreciation, the menial jobs, the ramen noodle diets, all in the pursuit of achieving their life-long dreams.

Here are the four lessons I learned from watching the Oscars on achieving life-long dreams.
1) No one is going to hand you anything. You need to go for it yourself. Actors aren’t asked to audition, writers aren’t discovered at the coffee house, cinematographers aren’t found on Instagram. Everyone who won an Oscar, went to Hollywood and worked for it. They probably spent years perfecting their craft, at home, with their friends, at school. But, in order to do what they wanted to do, they did what they needed to; they went to endless auditions before someone said yes, they submitted countless scripts before an agent said “maybe”, they took meeting after meeting showing their work before they were asked on set. Each and every person nominated, and those not nominated, didn’t sit back and wait to be discovered. They went out and discovered who they needed to connect with in order to do the work they loved.
2) Be a role model for rejection. How many “no’s” do you think these people heard before they got a “yes?” For some, it’s hundreds of times. Can you imagine hearing “no” 500 times in a row? How do you get yourself up to go to the next audition? It didn’t mean anyone was lacking in talent. It might have been that the timing wasn’t right, something about their delivery was off, their look wasn’t right, or maybe they weren’t in front of the right audience. Eventually, someone was the first person to say “yes.”
3) Learn to sacrifice, a lot. Not many of the people in that auditorium grew up in Hollywood. It means that in order to achieve their dreams, they had to pack their bags, leave their friends and families behind and start a new life somewhere unfamiliar. It was either fail or go home. There were odd jobs, crummy apartments, loneliness. How many people get off that bus on Sunset Boulevard and end up getting back on the bus a year or two later to go back home? I’m guessing there’s 1000 of those people for every one that stays. Some got homesick, some couldn’t deal with rejection, some found out they weren’t that talented after all, some found out they have other dreams. To pursue your dreams takes a lot of personal sacrifice.
4) Success does not happen overnight. There aren’t many overnight successes. Even if they are making their first film; an entire life’s work and experience went into shaping their career. There’s a back story that we never know about. We don’t know how long someone has been working at their craft. No one achieves success overnight.
The ones who held that Oscar in their hands after their name was called, had a lot of things fall into place for them and a lot of luck, but they also put in their hard work; their blood, sweat, and tears, literally. Think of that type of dedication the next time someone tells you “no” or you feel like people should be noticing your work. Maybe you need to draw attention to yourself and all the great work you’re doing. Not everyone knows how awesome you are, yet.
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Choose Your Own Adventure

January 21, 2014 by Leave a Comment

Choose Your Own AdventureRemember those Choose Your Own Adventure  books when we were kids? You would get to a crucial point in the story and you would be left with a decision to make because you couldn’t continue until you picked one of the two options presented (technically option three was you could stop reading). The options would be something like, “to open the door turn to page 39” or “to run up the stairs turn to page 51.” What to do? What to do? You thought about it, made your decision, and flipped the pages to see what would happen next.

Recently, I’ve been thinking about those books and saying to myself, “isn’t life just a constant choose your own adventure story?” Only now our decisions have more consequences than just reading a different part of a story. Yet, with these seemingly important decisions, we routinely do the same thing over and over without really thinking about it. Then when things don’t turn out how we want them to, we’re surprised. We end up in jobs and relationships that don’t satisfy us when we don’t think enough about what we want.

There have been plenty of times I’ve said to myself, “I should have known better.” If I had taken some time to think about what I was doing I might have chosen a better option. I’m not talking about “do you want soup or salad?” I’m talking about big life decisions. I think I’m going to try something new and have a monthly assessment of where I’m at with my life and where I want to go and see what decisions I need to make in order to get there. (Maybe I’ll discover it needs to be weekly, that’s part of the fun of trying this, who knows where this will take me).

What page do you want to turn to in your life story? What will you do to assess the decisions you need to make in order to get there?

Here’s to happy and fulfilling adventures!

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